Sitting here, sore, on day 6 out of 60 days in the gym, I’m mulling over my progress. Yes, I’ve come a long fucking way. BUT…
My appetite is HUGE. I’ve got to cut down the calories for the next 54 days to see max results. If not cutting down the calories, at least cutting the shit with sugar free sauces etc. I eat once a day, most of the time. That also has to change to ALL the time. I’ve done it all before, so I know I can. Now I will.
My goal in the next 54 days is the same as it’s been since December 18th 2022… to lose fat and gain muscle. My weight goal is 196. My body fat goal is 12% by next summer. I got to get my head straight fir the next 54 days. Lift harder, run more and almost of all, EAT BETTER!
Yes, I been working hard. I’ve been content. However, I’m not getting younger. As I sit here on vacation up at the beach, I realize that fitness makes me the most content and grounded. See, for the last 6 years, on and off, I’ve been working out to feel good. I’ve been working out to look good and feel comfortable around people. Apparently, it’s not working.
It seems I work out to feel good when I go out and party the once a month or so I do. It’s just not working anymore. I hate leaning on booze to be around people. Am k done? I don’t know. I wouldn’t say it’s an issue on the outside, but it consumes me inside. I’ll work out for stretches, then ruin it by drinking, start over and repeat. Work hard, play hard…. Right? That’s all I tell myself.
It’s not working anymore. From now on, it’s work hard, work harder and feel feelings. It’s be myself and be comfortable with that. I may drink again, but I don’t want to rely on it anymore to have fun. When I get home, it’s go time. In order to shake this addiction, I will immerse myself in fitness. I need a rush. Fitness is a rush. Bettering myself is a rush. It’s a vice. I have several vices and I need to eliminate some of the ones that are bringing me down. I can’t say I’m done. However, I can say I’m done doing it solely for the purpose of “work hard, play hard”.
It’s time to get where I want without distractions and build a strong mind. My own mind. I am ready for that.
It’s not enough anymore to do the minimum that I enjoy doing. I need to push out of my comfort zone and stop living with chaos in my head. I’ve done a lot, so I can do this. I will dk this. My mind is strong.
So, I have been doing great most of summer. However every month or a bit more I’ll go out and drink. This puts my gains and or weight loss back a bit. Now I’m on vacation and I don’t know if I want to have a few drinks this week. This challenge assumes I will. After which, I will go for 30 days to get under 200 lbs. This will be with taking creatine and lifting daily. I will add more running to the mix, depending on knee pain.
For 35 days, from Friday august 25th to Sept 30th, my sisters wedding, I will be eating perfect, lifting, running and staying super-consistent in my routine.
The ultimate goal is to lose fat and gain muscle. ALWAYS. Switching my diet to strict meat and eggs will guarantee I lose fat and overall weight. Lifting will help get some lean muscle. Walking and running is good for me and will work on fat, although it may cut into muscle.
I will grind hard and see where I’m at. This winter I feel like I’m set to make a big move and to change my whole body from ok to ripped. It’s hard work, but the summer is TOUGH. Being single, wanting to have fun with friends etc is why I do this. It’s, at worst, a big perk of becoming content and working so hard. Playing is fun too. The winter I will be fully focused on 12% body fat. A lot will change. However, for now, it’s a 35 day challenge. 35 days at gym, 35 eating good, 35 being aware of all habits.
Let’s fucking go!
Lifting every day
Minimum 2 miles on treadmill
12k steps a day
One meal a day
All meat and eggs. No ketchup etc. sugar free or not.
August has started and I’m content with where I’m at physically. I’m Content, not thrilled. This is because I just took a week off and a had some drinks, a lot of them.
Long story short… I just can’t do it anymore. I at least can’t drink regularly. My passion is too strong to get bigger, stronger, healthier etc. Every time I drink I set myself back. It probably takes 2 weeks to get back in a good rhythm. By this time, I’m planning to drink again.
It has been a fun summer though 😀
I’m not going to sit here and tell myself or others I’m not drinking again, I’ve been down that road. However, I will say I’m not drinking for a few months and I will rarely drink this winter, if at all.
My goal is to get leaner and leaner while putting on muscle. I also want a balanced life where I have fun as well. Drinking has got to stop being my definition of fun 🙄. Time to grind for 60 days.
I’m probably 215 now. My goal on my birthday, October 2nd is to be under 200. Let’s fucking gooooo!!
Since I started this journey on December 18th, many things in my life has changed…. For the better. Nothing, not one thing, is currently worse. Still, people question if I’m “happy” or if I’m too hard on myself?
This is what unhappy looks like with me….
1. Being in pain way more than I should.
2. Breathing heavy walking up stairs.
3. Not seeing family and friends because I’m embarrassed.
4. Becoming a hermit.
5. Being stuck in a constant state of addiction, nicotine, gambling, ANYTHING that will make me feel better, even for an hour.
6. Dressing like a bum because nothing fits right and I could care less.
7. Constantly feeling like I’m underachieving.. and being correct.
8. Feeling like I let everyone down.
9. Being a shit employee. At least not as good as I could be.
10. Hating myself and life and general.
BeforeAfter
Here’s the thing about that list. Not ONE of those are true today. I have no reason to lie. If you read my blog, you will see, if nothing else, transparency.
Getting to where I’m at right now, waking up before 4 am every day is pretty hard to do depressed. I love the grind. I love everything about it. I finally feel whole, complete.
Some may not want to jump in. Some take it slow. Slow and steady wins the race. In my opinion, these people just leave the door open to quit.
Right now I go to the gym 6-7 days a week. I do a few ice baths a week (would be more if I had a water chiller), take 2 cold showers a day, 30 minutes in the sauna a day, lift hard and do cardio EVERY time I’m at the gym, do 10k steps minimum and eat one meal a day, meat and eggs.
Today, I see friends, I see family as much as I can. I also excel at work. I have energy. I dress nice. I sleep well. I feel good. Period.
I can’t possibly imagine being unhappy and doing all this. 🤔. Seems impossible to me.
Do I want more out of life still? Fuck yes!! I want love, money, peace, comfort etc etc..Just like everyone else. The difference is, I’m going after it! I don’t and will never, ease into anything in life. So if you want to, go for it. Just don’t project your dreams of happiness on me. We are not the same.
Tomorrow I will start another long stretch of fitness and diet. This stretch will consist of 50 days of lifting, cardio and dieting, with the goal of 20 lbs weight loss.
The major emphasis will be on lifting and getting stronger. I will be tracking sets, reps etc. Consistency will be the key so I can see how I’m progressing. I’m going to do push pull legs for this stretch, which will be chest, shoulders, triceps on Sunday and Wednesday, back, biceps and abs on Monday and Thursday and legs on Tuesday and Saturday. Friday will be my off day since I work Thursday until 11 pm. If I don’t work on Thursday, I’ll do cardio Friday. Every week day will include ropes, pull and battle, 3 sets each.
My diet will be one meal a day, carnivore. I will stay strict, eating just beef, fish, chicken and eggs. No more fake sugar shit will be eaten. Not in the next 50 days. This means I will be lifting fasted. This is tough to really measure BUT eating carbs is just not for me. Not yet anyway. It triggers massive hunger in me and throws me off of my routine.
I’m going to try to get on some hikes at work and do extra things that will help me stay fit. This will include a mile a weekday at the gym on the treadmill and 12k steps minimum, on week days.
Every Fucking Day
My goal is to be 196 my first day of vacation, August 19th, same day as UFC Boston. I want to be feeling great by then. Being stuck in and out of strict fitness has been taxing. It’s time to do some more long runs of daily fitness of the strict variety. That’s always when I feel best. 💪🏼💪🏼🔥
I’m done worrying about weight. Cardio is good for you. I love it. It feels good. However, when I break my fucking toe, hurt my back, feel sick, etc… it’s gone. Not to mention it takes muscle. I’m done worrying about the scale, manipulating water, looking in the mirror and seeing half of what I should or could be. I’m done not wanting to lift, so I do cardio. Cardio releases endorphins and I feel great. Lifting is hard for me.
Bottom line: doing cardio is comfortable and at this point, useless except for health. For that reason, I will do it a few days a week as rest days during bro split. It’s time to gain muscle and lose fat. Everything will be geared towards that. That will be accompanied by lots of changes.
First off, I’m changing gyms. Lifetime has been great but it’s too nice, too expensive, and too far. I want to grind. I want to grind close to home. Can’t wait to get to Pro-Fitness and do just that. Grind in the dark with an extra hour of sleep.
I’m adding carbs in the morning, only fasting on cardio days. I’m adding creatine and whey protein for after working out. then I will eat again at dinner, mostly protein. Finally, I will finally track macros and meal prep accordingly.
So I will be 196 this summer. More important, I will be fit, not just a feeble skinny 48 year old. I need muscle to eat up calories so I can eat more moving forward. ❤️💪🏼
Every day is a grind. I’ve gained and lost a lot of people during this transformation. Time to give myself 💯. 😌
Be back with update in august. You might be shocked. You might not. Shit, knowing me, I could be 260 with diabetes 😂.
Tomorrow starts the month of June. Tomorrow starts 30 days of perfection. Eating, lifting, cardio, weight loss. That’s the goal. My back feels good. I’m not sick anymore. Most of all, it’s my last 30 days at Lifetime Fitness.
I’m starting this portion of my journey at 216 lbs. I’m fully loaded with ear buds, which have been terrible the last few weeks, always breaking or becoming lost. I’m ready. I’m ready for 20 lbs of fat to be removed…… Once and For All!!!! 196, here I come.
One meal a day
Only meat, fish, eggs, hot sauce, salt pepper, water
No days off
5 lifts a week
7 cardio days, including 2 ALL cardio.
15k steps average.
When it’s over I will post again and be at Pro Fitness 💪🏼😤🔥
So, I’m back on an 8 day streak at the gym and on my way to 30 days total. June 16th I’ll go out and have fun, watch some MMA and get back at it a few days later.
For the next 22 days, my goal is to get uncomfortable. This will include daily doses of at least one of the following:
Heavy lifting (squat, bench, dead)
Running at least 10 minutes on treadmill
Lifting after work in afternoon
Abs (daily)
Minimum 20 push-ups (Daily)
Other forms of cardio
Walks outside
Strict dieting. Just meat and eggs. (June 1 to June 16)
No gambling at all, time to start saving money.
Work every day (duh)
My weight right now is about 212 lbs, down 4 this week. my goal is to get under 200 in next 22 days. I’ll get there. 🔥💪🏼😀🏋️♂️🏃♂️
I’m thankful I had 5 months of decent health and ok back health. I had enough to lose 59 lbs in that time, so there’s that.
HOWEVER, when I do hurt my back and get sick on the same damn day, it sets me back in every way possible. My goal was 196 on May 28th to start. That then changed to May 13th, as my vacation changed. My goal was 8 lbs off with about 8 days left and BOOM, back tweaks the fuck out. I Pushed too hard and lowered water a bit. Dumb. At the same time, I start a massive cold. I’m done for 9 days and now I’m back up to 216 today.
Mentally, I was pretty broke. I was tired. I was on vacation. I went out and had fun. This cost me more time as I was still a bit sick. Balance was key. Balance was needed. Balance was almost, LOST.
It was SUPER hard getting back to the gym. Getting up at 3 wasn’t as easy as before. Things come easy when you do it EVERY day. Then suddenly they aren’t. I was railing. I was tired. I didn’t want to start over. Now, cold showers feel colder, my hunger feels hungrier, the sauna feels hotter, the treadmill hurts a bit more. But I’m back!!! That’s all that matters.
Well, here I am, not exactly “starting over”, since I am still down 48 lbs, with 20 to go. The time I put in didn’t change. I learned a lot in that time. I learned what I can and can’t do. I learned what works and what doesn’t. I’m ready to go another 44 days straight. Like I always say, starting is the hardest part. I did that. It’s fucking on now. July 1st I will be 196. After this, I will start building muscle and continue burning fat. First, I will get to my goal weight. My starting point.
I don’t care what anyone thinks about what I do either. I do it for me. For my health. For my piece of mind. I don’t need fat people telling me how to get “built” or what weight I need to be for my height. I’m good. I study this shit daily. For myself, for others. So please save it. I know what I want and I know what I’m doing.
The next 44 days will consist of more of the same. It will be my last at Lifetime Fitness so I can live life this summer without getting up at 3am. I’ll be at Pro Fitness and I can’t wait. First, I will kill it at lifetime though! I will be waking up at 3 and….
Quiet Desperation 